Goodness, what a hectic past couple of days. It was finals week at SCAD and it was such a rush. With two all nighter’s under my belt, I am here at 4 o’clock in the morning jotting down this incredibly exhausting experience.
All I have to say is that art school can be so rewarding and incredibly daunting at the same time. It has been the best experience, but some moments have been the most difficult and challenging moments of this season in my life. At SCAD we are required to take foundations courses that teach us the basics of art and design. Whether it is drawing, color theory or ancient art history, it’s all relevant and teaches us where we came from as artists. I consider myself a design student. I live, breathe and bask in design. I love it. Drawing…a different story. It takes me 3 times as long as a typical student to produce any sort of drawing and once it’s finished it has a 50/50 chance of mediocrity or success.
So with that being said, this past week and half was….a….mess. I finished my design final early, because I knew I needed to save the time for the beast in my life, drawing. Thankfully everyone in my class felt the same and were all by my side pulling all-nighters with me. They made my life so much brighter and kept me laughing until sunrise. I am so happy I know them. We had a pen drawing and a pastel drawing. I loved working with the pen and my final pen drawing was considered a success. The pastel drawing though…a different story. After working 50 hours on that thing, It was stamped as mediocre.
Isn’t it funny how life works out sometimes? It is insane what a measly little pastel drawing can teach you. Even if you work 20 hours more than your required time, you can still be mediocre. Some things you just can’t do and I have come to a complete understanding about this! At times like these it’s so easy to be bogged down by the noise of critiques and opinions, and you can either complain and play the blame game OR you can just laugh and move on. There is someone who will always criticize your work, but at the end of the day you accept your weaknesses and you excel even more at what you do best.
On the car ride home from my last day of school I was chugging down espresso, so I wouldn’t fall asleep on the road. During my fight to stay awake, I kept asking myself what I could have done to make it better. I played the “maybe if I” game! I was thinking, “Maybe if I pulled a couple more all-nighters” or “Maybe if I would have quit my job” I would have gotten the grade. I was thinking CRAZY, toxic things and at some strange moment I just started laughing loud and hard. It might have been the espresso mixed with the lack of sleep, but I was laughing because I cared so much about one drawing, one foundations class that I had, in all honesty, been so successful with. I made an 89.4 in the class and to me that is a bitter success.
This drawing, this grade was a fight and will always inspire me to push just a little more. Let your weaknesses become your inspiration and your let downs be your motivation.
I had my drawing professor for two quarters and I am so proud of him for all that he did for us. If there is one thing I will take from him, it is this:
“If this drawing is the worst thing in your life right now, then life must be pretty good.”
AMEN! Now to enjoy my spring break.